I’m here

****trigger warning I’m here…Trying to not make poor choices. I want to be self destructive but instead I play the everything is good game. I’m happy I’m motivated I’m smiling can’t you see? While inside I’m seething with anger and self hatred. I have an hour and a half left at work to fake it

Turn back Tuesday: Fighting sensitivity.

I was looking at drafts on my blog and found this snippet from ten months ago. Other than the last two days, and making a new friend. I feel not much bright spots in life. I’m so sensitive and paranoid about everything people do or say. I’m back to pre mood stabilizer I think. Then

Watch “Mary Lambert – “Body Love” LIVE Billboard Studio Session” on YouTube

I can relate to this on so many levels. I’m not going to fully get into it today. Just the main thought of this post is to love yourself cuz when it comes down to it yourself is all you have.

Stop the stigma

I’m not sure what all nami does but they are right the stigma needs to stop. We are not all child abusers or murders. In fact most of us only think to harm ourselves. We are our own worst enemy we don’t need anyone’s help in that. Or maybe I should just speak for myself.

Unexpected side effect. .. *** trigger alert

  I am thankful my fog is lifting and I have a proper diagnosis. I am not thankful for the clearer head that sees, feels, and knows all the bad choices, I made all those years trying to act as if I did not have mental health issues. I had gastric bypass five years ago.