YouTube had this thing called vlogmas. Im not doing a YouTube thing but i thought it be fun to do a writemas. Im not sure if im making this up on the spot or if it’s a thing already. Im going to post everyday something positive or pensive. If you like to join feel freeContinue reading “Dec 1 2019”
I paid for my real estate license exam course. I’m excited but scared. I hope it’s just not another bipolar whim. I really don’t think it is but of course we’ve been trained to doubt flipping everything. On the plus side if I don’t pass I get my money back or I have thirty daysContinue reading “I did it”
So far I firmly believe the four agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. Is really finally a book that is hitting home for me. It’s a little hard to get some concepts at first as he is very figurative where my mind wants to go literal but I just read a section that essentially said thatContinue reading “A must read”
Well sorta wordless. I took this spontaneous photo of my sparkler it gives me hope right now.
Ok memes out of the way 🙂 all relevant to me right now. Day one of writing a whole new chapter of my life. I’d love to say everything will be awesome and I’m starting the year with fervor. As most of you know I can’t life is on hold at least the month ofContinue reading “Happy New year!”
I know I’m not a perfect mom but I know my children feel loved. I am often distant and moody but rarely with them. I could play more games with them or go for a walk but most days I do good going to work and surviving. I wish I could be a more activeContinue reading “Children”
I have hope I’ll be happy again. Slowly as I find the right medication and through my therapist I’ll find myself. Recovery is possible. At least for today I have hope.
I think I’ve figured out where I am going wrong in my thought processes. I want a cure for my borderline personality disorder and bipolar. It doesn’t exist. No pill and no therapy will take it away. But I want it so bad. I don’t know what recovery means or looks like. I’m not evenContinue reading “Cure versus recovery”
It wasn’t a good day it wasn’t a bad day. It was a day. I ended up having off to take my son to the pediatrician and then I had to drive an hour to see my new therapist. I like him a lot. I feel hopeful with him. He wants me to figure outContinue reading “Today is a day”
I’m waiting for a psych eval for the dbt program. Why is the thought of getting better through a therapy program so scary? I think at this point I’ve tried a lot of things and tired of having hope. Plus waiting gets me anxious. Having to be truthful about how sick I am is scaryContinue reading “The hope game”