depression

Paranoia versus depression

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I’ve got both happening and not sure which is worse. Life feels so ominous.

Got a call into pdoc it’s like waiting for Christmas.

The even keel was awesome while it lasted.

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Pdoc update and life @@trigger alert

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Pdoc kept meds the same.

I’m wanting to self harm. I don’t understand these urges but I ask thankful I’m in a house full of people.

I had a couple things happen today to emotionally spiral me. I’m traveling with family and the people we are starting with are super uptight. I just want to be home in my safe environment. But my parents won’t go home early.

It didn’t help seeing an old friend with mixed feelings and a new friend who I’ve been emailing is mia today. How quickly we depend on people. It sets my anxiety and depression on alert. I just don’t want to exist and it’s so stupid to feel that way. I know. Why can’t I just be normal?

comments, questions, random thoughts leave below and please check out my social media sites! I appreciate you all! !!!

Worried and depressed

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So much so I don’t have energy to even bitch and moan about it.

Please send positive thoughts my way.

comments, questions, random thoughts leave below and please check out my social media sites! I appreciate you all! !!!

Like a light switch

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I felt it about eight yesterday. I flipped from hypo/neutral to anxiety/depression.
I’m sure I’ve always had the switches but it so fascinating to me to decipher them. I think I’m getting good at recognizing but still need a ton of help coping with them.did so well with food yesterday until the depression swooped in.

But one day at a time!

comments, questions, random thoughts leave below and please check out my social media sites! I appreciate you all! !!!

Like a light switch

Posted on Updated on

image

image

I felt it about eight yesterday. I flipped from hypo/neutral to anxiety/depression.
I’m sure I’ve always had the switches but it so fascinating to me to decipher them. I think I’m getting good at recognizing but still need a ton of help coping with them.did so well with food yesterday until the depression swooped in.

But one day at a time!

comments, questions, random thoughts leave below and please check out my social media sites! I appreciate you all! !!!

I almost think I like depression better

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My food issues are no better in hypo mode.

I’m more sensitive in between being hyper sexual, no off button, and wanting to spend money galore.

I got my first hater comment in my beauty blog. Does that mean I’m becoming someone. The person said I was whiney and negative Nancy.which I was so I replied and agreed I am negative thanks for stopping by and commenting. Then a see that wasn’t so negative bahaha

One minute is funny next it bothers me and makes doubt settle in. My sleep is horrid abd I’m even annoying myself at work.

I am negative but by design not desire. Deep breath and key it go!

comments, questions, random thoughts leave below and please check out my social media sites! I appreciate you all! !!!

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I can really tell I am in a weird disjointed hypo mania state. All day I have been funny and energetic and hyper sexual. Then I realized it was not due to my awesome personality but a switch in my brain. I still feel those ways but with an undercurrent of dread and sadness that it isn’t real and my mind just doesn’t get that all the time. On top of that I am so lonely. I cling onto any kind of attention and all my husband I do is NOT see eye to eye. It sucks living in a life where it is only half filled.