Waiting causes me anxiety

I’m sitting here waiting for my son to get his tooth filled. Not sure if it’s the wasted time and anger kind of anxiety or sitting in a room full of strangers and feeling alone anxiety. I know it’s a dash of passing the bill as I don’t get paid until the thirtieth and I

Therapy

I started with a new therapist yesterday. I already don’t like him. I think mostly because I want him to cure me and there is no cure. He said he’d work dbt skills with me. And he made me realize the people that make comments about me being different on meds don’t understand how my

Yolo follow up

I got the phone and I love it. But it makes me anxious as I know I didn’t need it. I also feel anxious as the kids go to camp next week and I’ll miss them. I have a lot at work going on too. so I worry at night before going to bed. I

For Good or Bad

I am the queen of letting people decide my mood or feelings about myself. It is a complete defect flaw. If I could change anything it would be this. It causes paranoia, flxations, and depression. And no amount of medication seems to subside this except when I was a zombie and didn’t care about anything.

This Song

I love this song I know all the lyrics by heart and would even sing it to my kids when they were a baby to put them so sleep. It is so relate-able to me it’s ridiculous. I had no idea it was about anxiety but when I listen now I know has to be.

Throwback Thursday: Medication control

I decided turn back Tuesday sounded dumb. lol I think it’s really suppose to be Throwback Thursday. I thought it’d be a fun segment to do until I run out of drafts. Over a year ago (April 27th to be exact) I wrote… “I wrote the comment below on a blog post from living in

All Alone

In an instant I was triggered into a depression. People are so disappointing. You try to do the right thing and it rarely works out. Others don’t care about the right thing and drag you down. I use to believe in the above saying that a horrible fate would be being alone but I think

Almost Wordless Wednesday

Turn back Tuesday: Fighting sensitivity.

I was looking at drafts on my blog and found this snippet from ten months ago. Other than the last two days, and making a new friend. I feel not much bright spots in life. I’m so sensitive and paranoid about everything people do or say. I’m back to pre mood stabilizer I think. Then

Virtual reality

I’m full of worry and anxiety. I wish I had a friend who I could really share my thoughts with. My struggles and why I don’t have a backbone. I have friends but their advice is all so different. And really it’s my life. I want to be able to plug in directly like virtual