Thank you and other blabbering

Thank you for the kind birthday wishes. It’s been uneventful but maybe that’s a good thing. I did have my ice cream cake so there’s that. Lol My mom is on about my weight again. I’m going to work in therapy how to kindly tell her it’s not helpful. In the mean time i just

#blogtober20 some might say

Some might say I’ve changed so much. I’m more introverted. I lack self esteem. I don’t reach out like i should. It’s officially my birthday today. Thank you for all the well wishes yesterday. I’m feeling rather lonely. I wish i had a big family to hang out with but then that doesn’t guarantee unconditional

#blogtober20 Saturday night

I’m going to do a big Ole nothing on my Saturday night. I sit here thinking of I’m ok with it and I’m really not. Tomorrow is my birthday and i really wish i had friends to celebrate it with. My parents aren’t even making a cake as we had a joint birthday party last

#blogtober20 holiday

I could totally use a holiday right now. Somewhere sunny with a beach. But that’s not happening any time soon. My mood is OK though the anxiety is back at least I’m not having suicidal thoughts. I’m looking forward to two days off. I like this quote as i need to remember my bipolar is

#blogtober20 all that she wants

It took me this many days to realize the prompts in following are song related. Anyway… all i really want is some peace that life will be better. I realized I’m scared to do therapy. I thought i wanted to dig deep but what if it’s too dark down there? I don’t want so many

Ugh

I start therapy today. Wish me luck that we click. I don’t know if I’m more nervous about it or talking with my boss here soon for our weekly staffing. Anyway better get off here as she’ll be calling soon.

Word vomit

I just feel like words vomiting for a minute. Once again i have nothing to do at work and too much time on my hands to think. I want a different life but i don’t know how to get it. I want so bad to quit but then how do i pay my bills? Every

#blogtober20 wannabe

This probably goes without saying but i wannabe without mental health issues. I want everyone to be free of them. I start therapy tomorrow. I’m hoping for the best. I know i need it. Got to get some of these cobwebs out. I talked to my boss and she was accommodating so that’s great. My

#blogtober20 fame

I wanted to be famous when i grew up. I wanted to be like Delilah and have my own syndicated radio show. I had the college picked out but like much of my youth it was just big dreams. I still would like to be famous but more so brene brown style.

Almost

I almost went to the psych hospital today. My psych dr wanted me to go instead of changing meds but the emergency room dr said no. So I’m back home but… i called my boss above my boss because my boss was out for the day and she told my Co workers i was out