So I’m reading atomic habits and it has me anxious. It’s an amazing book and I’m catching on I’m pretty sure.
The thing is at its core is says to change your habits you need to change your beliefs and identify or how you identify with yourself. Don’t just be a someone who runs marathons be a runner in general.
The crux is I’ve always identified as fat. My mom instilled this belief as a child to the point i would steal and hoard food to stay fat. About ten years ago i looked at a childhood picture and yes i was pudgy but not fat yet because this was ingrained to be my identity here i am at 44 morbidly obese.
This is a huge awakening for me. I so wish I’d realized this when i almost died from gastric bypass surgery. I maybe could have made real psychological changes BUT i can’t go back. I can only look forward.
The issue I’m running into currently is what identity is not fat? I don’t think skinny is the answer as i don’t know what that is. It’s changing my core belief in myself to healthy person be the identity? I’m so struggling with this that its got me slightly triggered into thinking it’s impossible which is leading to why exist? Damn it I’m going to figure it out though. Does anyone have insight by chance? You can dm me if you feel more comfortable at iaammyownisland@gmail.com