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What is it

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What is it about me that i become obsessed with people? I keep having dreams about people that probably don’t think of me. It’s so frustrating they are still on my mind. I’ll see a post of someone on social media and think of times we shared life moments and wonder if it had the same impact on them. I guess i just want to be noticed but then the past is the past for a reason.

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Flaws and all

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Here i am flaws and all… wonky eyes.. sunburned with enlarged pores… but with a smile because i love me. This year is about finding a way to love myself and I’m doing it. I’m not perfect at it but I’m better at it. And really that’s all we can ask for.

Not sure

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I’m not sure how i feel. I do know i have a much needed three day weekend coming up. I’m overwhelmed still but it’s workable i think. I’m learning right so…

I have an hour and ten minutes left of the work day. So that’s a plus. I hope it goes quick.

How are all you guys doing? Anyone need some support? I’m praying you’re all well.

Overwhelmed

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I am overwhelmed at work. It mainly had to do with the chaos of no one in my position for two months and the last person not caring to have ducks in a row. It of course brings on depression but not too bad thankfully. I just feel a cloud over me. One day I’ll know this job and it’ll be better. Other then that i like it.

Toxicity

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I’ve really been thinking how toxic I’ve been in the past. It’s not quite beating myself up level but a slippery slope to that i can feel.

I’ve lost my motivation to work. I feel i need a vacation this whole week but know i won’t get it. I have to much to do but I’m hoping for Friday off.

Be the shit

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Karma is a bitch. I try to live by the golden rule. Yet sometimes we shit on someone we didn’t mean to. I can’t think of a time i did it on purpose but I’m sure there had been. I use to do such devilish things. I’m sitting here having flashes of my past and trying to think if on purpose or just my undiscovered illness.

Still i did those things. I was reckless and selfish. I can’t take them back but I’d like a do over… sigh. How do i forgive and or forget?

I love you

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I may not know you personally but you have value and are loved. It may be hard to believe but i promise it’s true.