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Ugh… Looking for positives

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Another cruddy day… But instead of wallowing in it I’ve decided to think of positives in my life.

I woke up and get to live another day. I have tomorrow off. I have an awesome boss. I have parents and kids that love me. My car started this morning. This morning has went fast. I got a Starbucks today. I used the one dbt strategy I know and was mindful all this will pass.

That’s a pretty good list I think. What are your positives for the day?


Talking to your kids about bipolar disorder.

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I had this title in my drafts. The actual link I had isn’t good any more so I erased it but for this Thursday throwback I’m going to soak in the topic. I’m very open with being bipolar. Though I have learned not to tell everyone. I was honest with my kids about it though when I was diagnosed. They had an arrange of questions but have been excepting. Not one has my teenager thrown it in my face in fact he worries about me too much I think. The other day I always look mad or anxious. Gotta love the honesty.

I worry one of them will have it since I’ve heard it can be linked to genetics. Not sure if that’s true though. But so far no one seems to display symptoms. I thank God for that. Anyway do you think I did the right thing being up front with my kids?

Shitty day

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Today was another shitty day. My days have been really trying my mental health. I at least only have one more day of work then three days off. Granted one will be driving to get the kids from camp. So not looking forward to that. I have fears of driving but I do it anyway. I’m enjoying a strawberry ale. I think I like it better than wine. I’m also fighting hard not to buy the items I stopped myself from buying last night. So far so good 🙂 but the struggle is real. I guess that’s it for an update on today. I how you all are having a better day.

Small victory

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I stopped myself from spending my gas money to get my kids from camp tonight. The struggle is real! Lol but am proud of myself. I’m going to enjoy it while I can.

Full moon

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Is it a full moon? I’ve had the day from hell and it’s not even over. Saying serenity prayer to get me through.

I wanna be a kid again

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My youngest two are at camp. I miss them. It also makes me miss being a child. I’m an only child so mine was very lonely. I liked being an only child as a kid cuz I didn’t know different but as an adult it’s even longer than it was as a child. I don’t have people to visit or watch my kids or bitch about my parents too.

Wait I’m going on a tangent… The point of this post is I wish I could have a childhood redo. Be innocent but live in the moment more. It goes by so damn fast. I realize I wouldn’t know to live in the moment but I wish I could.

On that note I spend a lot of time wishing my life away. I need to live in the moment now. If I can’t as an adult how would I be able to as a child? These are just my thoughts for the night. All in all I had a good day. I’m tired so off to bed I go. 🙂