Sunday morning musings

This week for the most part has been perfect. I was on a staycation. And I didn’t get even close to what I wanted to accomplish BUT that’s ok. I made up for it in fuzzy warm feelings. My boyfriend has been here since Wednesday. My oldest was here two days and that meant other then my parents who we did go see I had everyone I truly love under one roof. It made me realize I must have done something good that my grown children and the one I’m still raising and I have awesome relationships. It’s not perfect but if a grown 21 year old male wants to still see his momma I think that’s pretty damn good. It earned my heart to have all three boys talking and showing love. It’s a feeling I want to hold forever.

One tarnish moment is a day my bf and I didn’t get along. It made me realize I’m not sure I ever really want to live with him. If he’s going to be stubborn and not talk when I am clearly upset I don’t want to go backwards in my self esteem and resolve. Thankfully that’s not until my youngest is out of the house so I have two years before the hard talk about real futures. I will probably feel different then.

My dad isn’t doing so good he might have cancer and have to have his kidney removed and despite living in what is supposed to be the best medical country. It’s all bullshit. He can’t get in unless the look at the scans and deem differently until June 30th. His mental health is taking a hit with worry and my poor mother is not the most compassionate. I truly feel for them both. I know one day due to age I will potentially lose them but I can’t imagine a world without them. So there’s that.

Tomorrow morning I have to drive an hour and a half away for my sons mri. He feels the tumor in his throat has grown. But it was time for his follow up anyway. Then next Monday is the drs appointment.

I start my new job July first. I am excited. I have three weeks until I officially quit this current job and I know time marches on but I feel it’ll feel like a long time. I could be wrong though. I will have the last week in June off as the first is a Friday. Weird huh?

I Guess that about sums up my life right now I’m going to do my best to enjoy today and then life real world will resume.

4 thoughts on “Sunday morning musings

  1. I know that feeling about having your boys all together at once. I have 2 grown sons that live on their own and my youngest is with me. When all 3 of them are under my roof at the same time it just makes my day. I love it! 😁

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