Can you save everyone?

I have a person on my case list that came to my services about a year ago from a suicide attempt and hospital stay. He did amazingly well for 9 months then his ex wife who he never got over died. He stopped taking meds and then fell off from ever seeing me. I knew he needed the support but I can’t hunt down a person. It came time to renew his goals which allow me to be able to see him and during a weekly meeting my supervisor discharged him. During that meeting I did not answer a phone call. I checked it later and it was his brother saying he’d asked for help that morning only to refuse the hospital but erratic enough they put him in a fucking jail cell on a 96 hour hold to find a hospital bed for him.

I tried the week to get a hold of him while in the hospital but they wouldn’t talk to me. He got out last Tuesday saw me Wednesday and it was so heartbreaking. He is still in the throws of erratic psychosis and not the man I came to appreciate as a fighter. He wants such a better life and knows he isn’t well. He’s trying and I give him all the credit in the world.

I share a snippet of his story as I’ve spent the week wondering if anyone can be saved from the torment of mental illness. I am high functioning as much as I don’t like labeling that but really I guess I am. Still I struggle often to maintain that tenuous thread of reality. I so want to “save” him but I know that’s too much of a burden to put in myself. I still worry for him and want a great life for all my people. I know I need to guard my heart as his life is his own but I’m not sure how to.

7 thoughts on “Can you save everyone?

  1. This breaks my heart. I hate how the system fails so many of us who don’t function well. There are so many good people within the system, but that just never seems to be enough. I hope he finds a hospital bed, soon. And I hope you’re able to realize that you can only do so much in your position and you did the best you could.

  2. That is so gross that someone would be held in a jail cell to wait for a hospital bed. That’s a seriously fucked up system.

    If the hospital refuses to speak to community care providers, that sure doesn’t do much for continuity of care.

  3. My son slipped through the cracks. 😦 I wish I could have saved him. He wanted to get out of the military and then study to become a social worker. He would have been a good one. If only…

  4. I think some of us don’t want to be saved by someone else. We just want someone who cares enough to stand by us and help with encouragement as we figure out how to save ourselves. Others need more help but ultimately…we all want to save ourselves. Many just do not know how

  5. that is heartwrenching!
    I can relate. In my job I come across heartbreaking stories, situations, etc.
    I want to save everyone, but I cant. I can only do so much, doesnt stop me from trying though!

  6. Can’t save everyone. Can’t save anyone tbh. No one could save me. Well except my higher power who I call God…when we realize how little control we have in this life we can rest knowing we did our part…

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