Over sensitive

My day yesterday overall was meh … work kept me busy. The bitch of it was the end when the guy who is leaving and I’m getting his clients appeared to question my integrity. I’m trying my best to reframe it as my perception yet all I’ve done is replay it over and over again. Hell I’m up early again because it invaded my dreams.

One step forward two back. That’s how life feels. And as usual it’s exhausting.

4 thoughts on “Over sensitive

  1. Hi Angela, I noticed that you used words like ‘appeared’ and ‘perception.’ I wonder if rather than re-framing what if you challenged your perception of the event objectively rather than emotionally? As you say, it was your perception —you take ownership and responsibility for your feelings, which is excellent— and it’s seems as though as you replay the event in your mind you may be overplaying the value of it and perhaps you’re experiencing negative automatic thoughts and cognitive distortions?

    1. Hmmm i like where you are going with it. Any tips on taking the emotions out? I do know that my integrity is important to me as i feel (there’s that word again lol) that people with mental health issues get labeled as untrustworthy though i haven’t shared my struggles at work. So again i might be perceiving again.

      1. In the context of cognitive distortions what you appear to be engaging in is ‘mind-reading,’ which is when we think or assume we know what someone else is thinking because it’s supports our negative stream of thoughts at the moment. “people with mental health issues get labelled as untrustworthy… if they find out i’m struggling with my mental health, then they’ll think i’m untrustworthy.” As you say, that’s merely your perception, but you don’t really know how they could react. Conversely, they may be struggling themselves and may be sympathetic to you. But at present it appears as though you need to identify the negative automatic thoughts (https://halowellbeing.wordpress.com/2021/03/18/negative-automatic-thoughts/) first and attempt to understand them in their context. You talk about ‘integrity’ and how it’s important to you. I wonder, is this your own principle, your own set of values, or have they been introjected, imposed upon you, from an external source, a parent perhaps? Sometimes we find that the values we hold to, our core beliefs, often set us up to fail because they’re so rigid and immovable. And depending where they come from, there’s a fear that if we deviate from them we may lose something, whether it’s love or respect. It seems as though these comments from a colleague has triggered your value of your integrity and your self worth, and maybe you feel insulted and diminished and disrespected? Perhaps because you’re struggling at the moment —we all are— you feel things with greater depth and sensitivity? That’s no bad thing. But what’s important to remember is that these thoughts are distortions. They may feel important and destructive to your well-being but they don’t represent facts. Separating yourself emotionally from your experience can be difficult but not impossible. It takes practice and in doing so you’ll find that you can look at these thoughts, doubt and distortions for what they are and not what you feel they are.
        Have a look at the link above and you’ll find some methods for combating negative automatic thoughts in the article.

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