I don’t want to be here. I just want to be in bed sleeping my life away but that’s no way to live. I will muddle through. I always do but honestly it’s a painful thing. Just breathing feels difficult.

8 thoughts on “Existing

  1. I understand these feelings and you have my empathy.

    I am worried about you. Is it possible you need a med adjustment or to talk to someone? I am not being rude, I am genuinely concerned. Your can do attitude is admirable, but I think deep down you know these feelings are artifact of the disorder, not normal healthy feelings.

    Needing help is not a lack of gratitude for all that you have that ‘should’ make you happy. It has nothing to do with that. Your can be loved and still…not feel okay.

    I hope things start sorting for you soon. You may have all of the external things that are great, but you’re obviously in a bad mental space and it pains me to see that. ❤

    1. Thank you for your concern. I don’t think i need a med adjustment. I truly think it’s just a down moment that is getting worse because of various factors. Maybe I’ll look into online counseling again. As i have exhausted my local people to no avail.

      1. If you ever just want to vent, you can email me anytime. I’m not a professional but I understand the feelings all too well.

  2. It’s no way to live forever, but it may be exactly what you need in the short term. Being in bed is no way for a race car driver to live, but after a bad accident, some have to for weeks or months. Mental illness and injury is really no different from physical illness and injury. Yeah, when you’re able to get out of bed, you should. Staying is an issue, but you’re never going to get to the point that you should get out of bed if you don’t get in bed in the first place. We all need rest. Some of us need more than others. It’s just self-care.

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