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I haven’t written much. Things are going ok. I’d love to say im recovered but that is probably a lie. I do let my emotions dictate too much. I desire things from my past that i know are toxic but I’m like what if.

I do feel ineffective. When will i get my passion back. Im just so monotone about things and i can’t find motivation. I miss being manic in that way.

But i do feel grateful for my job, my family, a roof over my head and food to eat. I love myself right now and that’s great news. Anyway just an update. Please share if you want how things are with you.

8 thoughts on “Emotions

    morgueticiaatoms said:
    February 12, 2020 at 7:21 pm

    ‘Total loss of passion for everything’ describes my current state. These winter depressions are the worst, so brutal. I force myself to write my blog because the depression has already robbed me of my creative writing outlet, I will be damned if I allow it take writing away from me all together.

    I am glad things are currently going well for you. I hope they continue to go well.

    I hope we both get our passion back, it’s what keeps the fire of your soul burning.

      socialworkerangela responded:
      February 12, 2020 at 7:30 pm

      I have big dreams but execution is hard πŸ˜”

        morgueticiaatoms said:
        February 12, 2020 at 7:34 pm

        I have trouble executing even small tasks, let alone going after big dreams so I understand where you are coming from there.

    Joshua Shea said:
    February 12, 2020 at 8:38 pm

    I know what you mean about that monotone. Just be careful not to romanticize the mania. It’s not our friend.

      socialworkerangela responded:
      February 12, 2020 at 9:00 pm

      You’re right that’s why ultimately i stay on my meds

    limitlessmare said:
    February 13, 2020 at 7:51 am

    I’m learning to enjoy monotony. I’m in a space where I realize it’s all the same: passion or monotone. Either way it’s life and it’s being lived. I’m learning to remove the labels and check in with myself to see what I truly desire for the day. I’m learning to be patient and listen to ME. It’s ok to try new things and decide they are not for me. It doesn’t make me a failure. I prefer the trying over sitting here doing nothing. Last winter, day in and day out all I could think about was dying. I’m grateful that same darkness has not payed a visit this year. I’m happy you love yourself right now πŸ™‚

    Haroon Mirza said:
    February 16, 2020 at 12:23 pm


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