therapy

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I don’t know why I’m having a hard time finding a therapist. Yesterday (since it’s two am) I had an appt. I was so anxious for it I almost cancelled but didn’t want that cancellation fee out of pocket. Anyway I felt the judgment from him that I’m seeing someone and I’m not even divorced. He said I need to role model for my kids and my ex could use it against me in the divorce. This made me feel like a horrible parent and paranoid. The thing is my ex told my boys about my friend. I felt it was adult business but he went there so they are curious to meet him. It’s difficult to know when is best for these things. This relationship is more then a fling. He is quickly becoming a best friend. Something I never had before. 

Anyway then it turned even darker with at least fifteen minutes of how I need to eat healthier and exercise. That I can give any excuse in the world I just need to do it. I was like first wtf second let’s figure out why food is comfort to me. Let’s dig deep and have an ah ha moment. But no instead it was he does it so I should too! 

I don’t know what to do I can’t keep going through therapists. I’m running out of options in my small town. But I need someone who will dig deep and at the very least not mention a word about themselves!

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6 thoughts on “therapy

    Culbert Sinnsen said:
    November 11, 2016 at 5:45 am

    That sounds awful. He doesn’t sound like a good therapist at all.

    A Single Parent's Life said:
    November 11, 2016 at 1:00 pm

    I do not blame you don’t sound like someone I would go back to either. I like my therapist but I don’t feel like we get to in depth about things either just mostly what’s going on how I’m feeling now that’s it. Nothing about the past and what has went on.

      A Single Parent's Life said:
      November 11, 2016 at 1:07 pm

      It is hard to know when to let your kids meet someone new in your life. It was not right for your ex to tell your kids you are talking to someone new at all. That is for you to do when your ready. If you are not ready to introduce them to him then just tell them that you are not and that when you are you will let them know. I still wish I had waited before inducing my kids to who I was talking to after me and my ex split up. You were being a roll model you were leaving your kids out of it, your ex is the one who told them anything different. So don’t beat yourself up over it, you were keeping it away from your kids. It’s not a bad role model not telling our kids everything we do or not inducing them to everyone we talk to. A bad role madle would be telling them all your personal life and bringing who ever home all the time and letting them see it. But you already know that.

        socialworkerangela responded:
        November 11, 2016 at 5:14 pm

        Thank you for your encouraging words

    Blooming Lily said:
    November 12, 2016 at 6:12 pm

    Please don’t go back to this person. I am appalled by the way he interacted with you (FYI it doesn’t matter what he does, and it makes me mad that he minimizes your struggle, and looked at you with judgment – the biggest two things that therapists should NOT do!!). This is NO fault of your own. xoxo

    Penny Lane said:
    November 12, 2016 at 7:26 pm

    It has so many therapists to find a good one! Believe me, I must have seen every single person locally! Some were expensive, some worked by donation, they’ve been varying ages. It was so bad I thought I’d never find one that suited me. But after years I decided to go with a woman I knew that facilitated women’s workshops. At least I knew her reputation. But that was a gamble because if it didn’t work, I worried I’d miss out on the workshops. Fortunately it has worked, to a degree. Therapists use different models, have different perspectives, and it has to be someone you trust and makes you feel safe. To that end, don’t feel bad or uncomfortable about trawling through the phone book if you have too! Or asking around – it’s amazing how many people have seen or see therapists. On the first session you should be interviewing them about their experience, techniques, specialist knowledge. I know it is so hard to find a good person, but better to keep searching than stick with one that’s no good for you. All the best xxx

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