end of the day

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I had an awesome day but I sit here outside feeling down. It’s over my parents and a family thing I had to cancel because my husband bullied me into it because he wasn’t invited. My husband and parents don’t get along and it was a day trip to the zoo. Anyway… I went to the high school football game but only stayed a short time my younger two got bored. My mom was saying how we can’t do anything as the boys don’t like doing things. This bothers me. Is my mental illness rubbing off on my kids? I want them to have fulfilling lives but they seem to bore so easily and didn’t have friends to hang out with while there. I don’t expect my kids to be popular but I want them to have friends. Maybe I’m thinking too hard on all this. But I feel like I’ve disappointed my mom by leaving early but frankly I was bored too so why stay? Was it a waste of money? Ugh why does a good day have to end with self doubt. Plus my mom said how my dad won’t go to a psych Dr for better anti depressant meds because they haven’t helped me. But I finally feel like they have. It makes me doubt I will stay this up and will become depressed again. I’m scared of that. Just so much on my mind I can’t shut it off. Sigh.


4 thoughts on “end of the day

    itsgoingtotakeayear said:
    October 1, 2016 at 5:51 am

    Ugh. I think we can almost all attest to having had your night before and it is a very uncomfortable feeling to know. Today marks the start of a new month where you have thirty one chances at a great day.
    Kids get bored and it’s okay – that is not a reflection of you.

    myambivalentexistence said:
    October 1, 2016 at 10:22 am

    Sometimes family sucks 😦 Sorry your spouse and your family don’t get song. But you have to decide what’s right for you. I had a similar situation recently where my brother was angry at my husband. He talked to me and let me know about my dads 65 th birthday , but it was just dads kids (Subtext, hubby wouldn’t be welcomed), so I didn’t go. I didn’t even bring it up with hubby. If someone wants to be exclusionary that’s on them. I mean I do things without my hubby, but to deliberately exclude seems wrong.
    As far as outing with kids, well kids are kids. They get bored easily and they just don’t want to do things that don’t interest them. Kudos for leaving when it was right for you and your kids.
    I think that finding the right medication combo is difficult , but when you do it’s pretty good. I think you are a lot more level on your new meds than you were before and it’s because you kept trying and didn’t give up.

      socialworkerangela responded:
      October 1, 2016 at 2:01 pm

      Thank you as always for your support. Your right on all accounts 🙂

    manyofus1980 said:
    October 11, 2016 at 9:30 am

    sending hugs I am sorry you had so much to worry about that really sucks because there is nothing worse than worry. xxx

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