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I’m waiting on the nurse to get my release paperwork back to work in order. I’m suppose to be on call this weekend but I really need the break. Hell I just got out of the hospital. My work doesn’t seem to care so why should I care back right? I’m sitting here worried I’ll be released today because the doctor won’t understand my needs. I’m trying to use my coping skills of positive thinking and mindfulness to stay stable. It’s actually kinda working. Plus writing to you guys usually helps as well. Is it sad I’d rather still be at the hospital? I feel guilty to feel that way but I had no worries but to take care of myself. It was ok to be selfish. I had structure and hope. I still have hope but the answers aren’t so concrete. I’m just not sure what to do career wise etc. I wish I had clarity but my fear is getting in the way I think. Fear of the unknown and what is the right thing to do. 


10 thoughts on “waiting

    🌐 'M.' 🌐 said:
    September 9, 2016 at 8:33 am

    you gotta take care of yourself, and if it’s doctor’s orders… ☺

    Sharon DeVinney, Ph.D. said:
    September 9, 2016 at 8:34 am

    No, it is not sad that you’d rather be in the hospital. If you can take some transition time before returning to work, do so. Be good to yourself…the career questions will sort themselves out. Trust your gut about the right thing!

    BipolarOnFire said:
    September 9, 2016 at 9:21 am

    I wonder if you could go on Short Term Disability. It seems both cruel and unrealistic to have to go back to work right now. Maybe your doctor could write orders for short term disability and say you’re unable to work right now. Just a thought…

      socialworkerangela responded:
      September 9, 2016 at 3:20 pm

      I wish… They already sent a note saying I’m good to work 😦

        BipolarOnFire said:
        September 25, 2016 at 8:28 am

        That is brutal and heartless!!

    Penny Lane said:
    September 9, 2016 at 10:19 am

    Not sad at all. The hospital offers respite from the everyday dramas, it’s a safe place where needs are met more quickly and you can rest and rely on the staff. During this low I’ve considered respite myself. A chance to recharge, tweak meds and focus solely on recovery. But I’d advise taking it easy – especially where work is concerned. Screw them! They can wait! I’m learning that my wellbeing comes first and things need to be balanced xx

    myambivalentexistence said:
    September 9, 2016 at 2:27 pm

    Your health, both mentally and physically have to come first. Is there any way to get disability. I know you feel that you can’t really make it without your paycheck , but with disability you would get the time off and a percentage of your paycheck.

      socialworkerangela responded:
      September 9, 2016 at 3:22 pm

      I’m not sure where to start with it. I’ve been released back to work already 😦

        myambivalentexistence said:
        September 10, 2016 at 8:30 am

        I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself and not working the weekend. Is there any way you can work fewer hours ? That might be easier to manage ?

    manyofus1980 said:
    September 10, 2016 at 6:20 am

    they released you already? wow. they really rushed things for you. you should have been able to take a break for a week or two. hugs for you hon. xoxo

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