I’m waiting on the nurse to get my release paperwork back to work in order. I’m suppose to be on call this weekend but I really need the break. Hell I just got out of the hospital. My work doesn’t seem to care so why should I care back right? I’m sitting here worried I’ll be released today because the doctor won’t understand my needs. I’m trying to use my coping skills of positive thinking and mindfulness to stay stable. It’s actually kinda working. Plus writing to you guys usually helps as well. Is it sad I’d rather still be at the hospital? I feel guilty to feel that way but I had no worries but to take care of myself. It was ok to be selfish. I had structure and hope. I still have hope but the answers aren’t so concrete. I’m just not sure what to do career wise etc. I wish I had clarity but my fear is getting in the way I think. Fear of the unknown and what is the right thing to do.