I’m having a lot of negative self talk this morning. So much for stable. I am trying to counter act my negative self talk with mindfulness. I tell myself that’s not true it’s my hard wired brain trying to stay in the same negative thought patterns. It just makes me wonder why I have to be this way.
I’m also thinking of death. What it would be like to know you were dying. Mainly in a car accident and bleeding out. Makes my heart race thinking about it.
I kept dreaming about work last night and being late. I also dreamt about being at Wal-Mart and returning things or getting a cart full of groceries just to have them disappear and I have to start over. It has to mean something but I’m not sure what.