Not sure

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I’m not sure what I’m feeling today. It’s the last day of my five days off then back to work. I have no motivation but I don’t feel sad. I feel nothing really. Or maybe this is what normal feels like. I wouldn’t know. It’s eerily creepy and unsettling but maybe my mind is so use to feeling anxious or sad it’s trying to find a problem. Who the hell knows ๐Ÿ™‚

4 thoughts on “Not sure

  1. I get this way fairly often. I almost feel numb. It’s my personal belief that this is was people without BPD feel every day. It TERRIFIES me! I think to myself, “Is this really what I’m striving for?” Apparently, people without mental illness feel content while feeling nothing. They can be alone with it. Personally, I hate that feeling, and I think it’s because I’ve been in the dark so long. You know, when you’ve been in the dark for as long as many of us has, when someone turns on a light, it takes a while for your eyes to adjust. I just don’t like the adjusting process.

    Good luck with this. It is my hope that you may one day feel content with this feeling on nothingness. Good luck!

    Evan

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