I feel the darkness closing in. I almost took myself to the hospital but that would just make matters worse. I’m stronger than the darkness damn it. Though is difficult and feels like it is engulfing me. I got a frivolous movie to watch and some wine. I know drinking isn’t good for us but I need something to let me relax. Rationally I’m sure my worries that are triggering me are little but in this state they feel huge. I need to forget my worries so wish me luck.