All pdoc did was tell me I’m in a mixed state and upped my abilify. She wants to stop me on lamictal one day. I don’t know why. It is cheaper and the usual med for depressive bipolar people I thought. She didn’t want to hospitalize me. I feel I need it. So I’m at work waiting for this day to be fucking over. I am no longer suicidal but I had an active plan so I don’t get it. I have insurance… private so I don’t get an advocate. I called for the dbt program which will have me travel to it and there is a wait list. She wanted me to make appt before I left I tried but the person who sets appts want available. I can’t catch a break. Whine whine whine.
At least I’m not in pain right now mentally just in that gloom of being that way earlier. One moment at a timei keep telling myself this will pass.
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